Simon has been nagging me to write my Blog, which has been sadly ‘found wanting’ as I had lost inspiration. He told me my Blog was about me, not always about sewing, quilting and embroidery but about me and what I do, am doing and want to do so here goes.
Life dealt my family a terrible blow, we were and are not unique, but we never imagined it happening it to us. When Simon got cancer, my mind, body and spirit went into over drive, not having him in my life was not an option, and taking one day at a time took on a whole new meaning. So for a year my life, body and spirit became and centered on Simon! My first thought in the morning, last at night, but now it is nearly two years since he was diagnosed and now he is finally coming back to his old self - giving me orders – you know how it goes: ‘Simon says…’.
So regular blogging is my new challenge, my goal is to make this blog a record of my life, up front and honest – you may like it or not, be it as it may, it is my blog, my life and my challenge. My hope is that in sharing with you, my online friends, that maybe I will touch a chord in you and give you the courage to ‘live the life you imagined’ before it is too late.
I will deal only briefly with my life before ‘freedom’. For years I lived with fear, in so many ways and days, it sapped my soul with me living such a false persona – no one knew only me. It was only when a friend told me how ‘perfect’ I was in home, husband and children, that I faced the fact that this was only a show and that I was totally unhappy and the only person who could do anything about this was me – feel the fear and do it anyway and that ‘on the other side of fear is freedom’.
In the ensuing years, I recreated myself totally, became the person I always wanted to be and built and worked in my own business. Yes it was hard, challenging and demanding, but at no time did I consider giving up. Anything you do repeatedly becomes a habit, rather than an act, so I started the journey of ‘change’ in my 40’s would you believe.
You know I always thought I wanted to be that ‘helpless woman’ who needed to be looked after – I shared this with my doctor once and he laughed and replied: ‘Jenny you would only last a week.’ I think he was correct even if a little pampering doesn’t go astray, but becomes boring very quickly!
‘Feel the Fear and do it anyway’ became my mission statement and a whole new life opened up to me. So today I am starting the journey of keeping a paper trail, in the form of a blog of my life, to prove I do exist and hopefully inspire, motivate and touch a chord with those who read this.